WTF Confidence.


We all have confidence fails but no one talks about them, and I say boo to that.

Lately, I have been feeling guilty for working (yet again). I have been feeling guilty everytime daycare calls and tells me Logan has bumped his head, or tripped on his shoes, or is not feeling good. How can I not be there for him when this happens? Why am I putting him in these situations at such a young age? Is he mad at me for making him go to daycare and not stay home with me? And then on top of all of that guilt I have been having a hard time feeling valued at work.

I know why I am working. I am working to make sure Logan doesn’t grow up in the same manner I did. While we had what we needed most times, we never experienced life. We did not go on family vacations; I had to work at the gymnastics club to pay for my lessons, I worked 18 hours a week starting at age 14 to save for a car. I do not want him to have to live like that. I want to make memories on the beach with him, see his eyes light up on a roller coaster, watch him run like a crazy person after eating cotton candy at the fair all while sporting some great sneaks. Sometimes though, when your not confident in what you are doing, it trickles into other areas of life.

Value is a hard thing to calculate because everyone values themselves in different ways. Some people are strictly on the monetary side, some people on the responsibility and trust, others on independence. While value isn’t a one-size-fits-all. I can tell you mine stems from a little of all, and not necessarily in a bad way. After speaking with my therapist, (aka the husband) things became a little clearer. I made a pro-con list, yes, a pro-con list. It was interesting to see how one con can effect your self-confidence, even though, your pro list is off the charts.

So how does one fix this? Well, I am working on it. I’m trying to make sure Logan knows I am there for him, at all times during the day and I’m working on the con section to fill the gaps. It may not be perfect but hey sometimes confidence needs to be built.

Fit Mom Fix – Update

Fit Mom Fix


I was so excited about my trip to Paso Robles that I forgot to update everyone on my fit mom fix plan. I did not eat as healthy as I envisioned but I am happy to report I cut out the majority of sugary treats that I normally eat on a day-to-day basis (like those amazing Mr. Goodbar’s that are located in a martini glass on my co-workers desk). I also upped my water intake and started playing with fruit combos. My favorite so far was cucumber and blueberry as well as lime and peach.

When it came to working out, I am happy to report that Logan and I went on two long walks. At one point he wanted me to carry him, so I was pushing his buggy with weight in it and carrying a squirmy two-year-old on my hip. I was able to get in a five-minute booty workout in twice a day as well as, a ten minute ab workout. So, while it isn’t much, it’s something.

When I was in Paso Robles, we walked everywhere and I worked out my arms by doing push ups and tricep tips on the bed railing. So… I take that as a win this week.

I’ll slowly step it up as time goes on BUT for now… I’m proud of myself for trying to work out on my down time.

Wine Country

Paso robles 2

The universe allowed this mom to head out on an adventure and forget about diapers, tantrums, and nursery rhyme songs. In fact, I was able to find a little piece of Meghan that may have gone missing but is slowly finding her way back, right along side mom and wife.

One of my best friends, Brit, and I ventured out to Paso Robles for the weekend. We left on Friday and returned on Sunday, so it was a quick trip. Just enough to make me dive into my new hobby; wine. I have never been a heavy drinker, I am not one for shots, and on occasion I’ll have a martini. It wasn’t until I was gifted the knowledge of purchasing a bottle Duckhorn wine (specifically Decoy, Pinot Noir, 2013) for our Thanksgiving dinner in 2014 that my love for wine started. I found myself wanting to learn more about wine and go on tastings. Then I realized I lived in the desert and the only winery we have is in Pahrump. So when I got the text to go to Paso Robles, I jumped at the chance.

We had a six-hour drive from Las Vegas, and the views were not that appealing. But at least we were given the time to read about Paso Robles. Brit told me that is was Pinot land, and I was hooked. Pinot Noir is by far my favorite wine. We arrive in the early afternoon and parked downtown. The shops in Paso Robles were adorable, I particularly loved The General Store and Brown Butter Cookies. The General Store had local delicacy’s, homemade jewelry, and gorgeous boutique clothing. I left there with a heap full of homemade taffy from Mehlen Bacher’s Taffy. I’m trying to not eat a lot of sweets and cut down on my sugar intake.. but these babies, I made an exception for. And lastly the Brown Butter Cookies. The store is adorable, the staff was so sweet and helpful, and I may or may not have sampled each flavor. The original cookie I had paired so well with Pinot Noir.

That evening we had three tastings. One was a sparkling wine called Bling. The wine was interesting, I loved the smoothness of the flavors (Brut, Peach, Raspberry, Pomegranate) and ended up trading in my $5 tasting for a $20 bottle of the Peach Flavor. I wasn’t too much of a fan of our next stop. They had a lot of Zin’s, and I’m not a Zinfandel fan. The last stop was Asuncion; they are known for their Pinot Noirs. So I had a flight of three, a 10′, 11′, and a 12′. The 2010 was hands down my favorite, so I bought a bottle of that.

Saturday was a full day of wine tasting. We ended up only making it to four wineries. We choose strategically based on the wine we all like vs. what was closed. We tasted at Chronic, Chateau Margene, Windward Vineyards, and Dunning.

Chronic: They had fun skulls and day of the dead type drawings. They only had one wine that I like, so I didn’t end up buying any wine there.

Chateau Margene: I may join their wine club. The wine was great, even the chardonnay. I do not like white wine, but this was smooth, and I liked it. We had a wine tour here. This place was a small boutique vineyard. It is a father and son team with a couple of additional workers. They hand pick the grapes, they shake and use pressurized oxygen to start the process. And you could tell, the wine, all of it, was amazing. I bought a bottle of wine that was Cab Fran, Cab Sav, and Merlot.

Windward Vineyards: This was a beautiful view, and they only had Pinot Noir. We had a vertical flight with 09′, 10′, 11′, 12′ and 13′. The difference was incredibly different; I wasn’t ready for that. I also was able to charm them into letting me try the 14′ wine right out of the barrel. That was one my favorite but, of course, I didn’t get to buy any since it wasn’t bottled yet.

Dunning Vineyards: This was the most secluded. The location was so remote there was no way you couldn’t just stop and enjoy the views. The wine was good. I bought a bottle of Zinfandel here. Which makes me want to pinch myself because, I don’t like Zinfandel, but this was great.

On Sunday, we went Olive Oil tasting. I couldn’t believe how amazing olive oil tasted. I was sad they didn’t have the flavors that I liked in smaller bottles. So I will wait to get those.

This trip was great. I was able to sleep, have girl talk, and dive a little deeper in the wine world.

Have you been to Paso Robles? Napa? Tell me all about it!! I am already planning a trip back.

Paso Robles

Fit Mom Fix

get fit stay happy

Bikini Season is almost upon us.

For a mom… This just sucks.

The pressure society has put on body image makes it near impossible to keep when you have a kid. The whole; schedule time for yourself (that would be called sleeping…or drinking wine), or how about; make your workout the same importance as a meeting…(you going to tell that to my two-year-old who says, mama, miss you, no go?).

So what can be done?

How can mom’s get their daily dose of exercise?

My opinion? Slowly and throughout the day. You have to get creative and you have to space out your workouts…and in some cases, re-think the word workout. A spin class is awesome, but so is jump roping while your little one climbs up to slide for the 100 thousandth time. Ab class is wonderful, but so is working them out while you watch nursery rhyme videos and making a snack for your little muffin.

It is all about creativity. That is why I have decided to dedicate myself to 30 days of exercise. I am calling it my 30 day fit mom fix. I’m going to eat new foods (quinoa anyone) and make the most of every opportunity to “workout”. For example yesterday I went on a two mile walk pushing Logan in his push car. I put two five pound weights in the “trunk” to make it harder. So I pushed 30lbs for two miles, that is successful in my book.

Stick with me as I update you weekly. Anyone want to join me?

One Foot In Front Of The Other

I have a confession; I do not have it all figured out.

Last week I received an email from a beautiful soul back east who told me that my blog has given her inspiration to continue on, even when times get rough because…I have it all figured out and she has the hope to figure it all out one day as well. While I am uber flattered I don’t want to lie. I am here to say, I do not have it all figured out. Blogging can be a funny thing, many people get to see snip-it’s of your life and based on how pretty your clothes are, how your hair is styled, they way you write, the things you do, etc. make your life looks so much more glamorous than it is. Now do I think my life is glamorous? Hardly but I love it all the same.

The year 2015 is already shaping up to teach me a whole slew of new life lessons. Learning how to be a mom, wife, career woman, and lastly this girl name Meghan has been a struggle, to say the least. Things have happened to me that have made me take a step back and wonder if I am in a movie. There is no way I should be old enough to deal with these things. With only being three months into the new year, friendships have been formed, been tested, and been strengthened. I have learned how to stand up for myself and be able to be proud of where I am in life.

If you stop and listen to the signs that life gives you along the way, then you will see that it is as easy as putting one foot in front of the other and hanging on for the climb.

I do not have anything figured out because life is always changing. In my mom world, I am currently trekking through this world called toddlerhood. Have you heard of it? It involves random screaming fits (I am sorry, you can not run with a fork in your hands), weird toddler songs about using the potty (who invents this stuff), picky eating (Zaba’s… we go every weekend because he wants tacoooo’s and wwwiccee) and the inability to just chillax once an awhile. In my career work, I am dealing with the stresses of hoping that I am achieving everything that I have set out to… Is my design still up to par, are people reading my writing, how in the world am I suppose to hire two new people for my team and train them and wait…what…what do you need (okay, I’m on it!!). My wife life… I love my husband, I swear, he gets the short end of the stick sometimes, but I need him 150% of the time. Lastly, this Meghan thing… Who is she? Isn’t she Logan’s Mom? The Marketing Manager? Wes’ Wife? Yeah, this one I am still working on. What fun is life if you don’t have it figured out?

Cheers to all of you who thought I had it all figured out and damn I just told you all I didn’t.

Here’s to one foot in front of the other.

My Best Friends Bump

It has been twelve years since the first time Makenna, and I became friends. I had to let that sink in for a little while because twelve years is a long time. We were still in High School listening to Simple Plan and Blink 182 when we met and have stayed friends through college, moving out-of-state (she went all the way to Hawaii), boys and break ups, getting married, my baby, and now…her baby.

I went to St. George, Utah to take her Maternity pictures. The glow this lady has is ridiculous, I was a hot mess and would never have thought to take maternity pictures but not this girl. Her hair is fabulous, her skin is smooth and has that pregnancy glow everyone dreams about.

I can not wait for Logan’s new best friend to be born in April! Until then, here is a look at her Maternity session.

Maternity Picture - Maternity Picture - Maternity Picture - Maternity Picture -

You can see more here!!

It’s a race!! UPDATED


UPDATE – The End

I have mixed emotions about this race. I was able to create some amazing memories with my friends, and we did some things we never thought we would. Like drinking a slurpee in less than 40 seconds (32…if you wanted to know) and perform service that was much easier to do than you’d think. But the way they chose winners just did not jive (and this isn’t just my opinion, there were around 15 teams we talked to at the event, and they all said the same thing).

We finished 3rd out of 38 teams, which sounds great, except we completed 50 points MORE worth of challenges than the next team near us. We performed service like it was no one’s business, drove out to Primm; we were super creative on some of the challenges and yet found ourselves called up third during the award. Now, I understand this may sound like we were sore losers, but after thinking about it, thinking about the overall mission, and looking at the other two winners (2nd and 1st in our division)…I’m upset. If you are going to judge based on someone’s opinion of your challenges, then you need to create a rating system vs. a scoreboard. Put the challenges on a rank based on easy – hard and go from there.

Do I recommend the race… Yes. Plan on creating competition between two groups of friends vs. competing for anything they have going on. The app is great, the concept is great, the execution is just like gymnastics, ice skating, and diving…someone’s opinion vs. the scoreboard. This is why the NFL is so popular.

See our teams challenge here!! 

Second Place Here

First Place Here

Take notice of the winners (a sunrise when time didn’t start until 7am, 23 miles worth of trails and all the other things you did…in 8 hours. Something just isn’t right here).

As of right now.. My friends and I are on a race! Not just any race but a race around our city. Questival is a service and community race put on by Cotopaxi. Some of the coolest things we’ve done so far… Swing on a rope swing, share ice cream with someone, donate clothes and food… Basically just be badass!

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